Your husband is a what?

Hillbilly Mom's story of her husband being sick during her vacation made me think of all the times my darling hubby has conveniently been on his deathbed during my vacations which of course fall on the school's vacations. I am not quite the teacher that Hillbilly Mom is. I could be but have instead chosen to be what I like to call a glorified tutor. Don't get me wrong. I love my job-- lots, actually. However, it is not such a demanding job or a soul-sucking job like Mean Teacher's. Hillbilly Mom reminds me a lot of my mom, and her stories from 32 years of elementary lovelies. Back to the story, Hubby has gotten bronchitis several, several times. Funny thing is, he usually gets it very sudden-like and always on my vacation. The first time was our first married Christmas together. He went to the doc who wanted to put him in the hospital because he also had pneumonia. How do you not notice something like this? Hubby never does until he just can't do anything but lie on the couch and barely breathe. Did I mention that he is very melodramatic? Or a great big faker? I swear sometimes, when he calls in sick, he purposely sounds like he is just about to keel over into a grave. His boss, who was once upon a time my relative, sometimes calls and imitates Hubs, and we have a great laugh over it. I swear it is the funniest thing you could ever see a grown man do. Now that we have children, I do not feel the need to constantly check his temp, get him drinks, rub him down with alcohol, make him soup, etc., etc., etc. We are getting fairly close to forty here people. Apparently, Hubs has always been this way. When he was little, he would make himself sick if he knew his mommy planned to go somewhere while he was in school. And she let him get away with this people. Now, I am not so hard-hearted, people. I would let one of my kids skip every once in awhile when I know they are not really sick. There might be something else going on that they are not ready to deal with at school. But Hubs is now a grown man. Physically anyway. He can deny it all he wants, he is still a mommy's suck-titty baby. The last time he was sick, I had some clues that soon he was going to be ill and began to hound him about taking his allergy medicine and getting a jump on his cold/whatever before it became a big problem. Did he, you ask? Ha ha ha Ha ha. I don't think so. He laid in our bed for at least 4 days straight. While I was at work, I know he had to have gotten up and made soup because I found evidence of such. When I was home however, completely helpless he was. And so, so pitiful. Like I don't have enough to do. Man, I do sound hard-hearted. Hmmmm. Well, maybe tomorrow I will tell you the story of his vasectomy, and we will see what you think then. I have to admit, this is a lot of fun to vent/write/whatever you want to call it. Feel free to leave a comment and tell me what your husband might be. Mine is a ....kittycat. Hahahaha---I am sure that one is not too much of a stretch. Maybe I should tell the story of the time I almost lost my baby toe, and he had to have a cool rag for his head. Yes, I believe I have some things to say....